


Edge of the Guillotine

by Ms_Ice



Category: Original Work
Genre: Diary/Journal, F/F, Lesbian, warriors - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-02
Updated: 2019-11-02
Packaged: 2021-01-20 19:04:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21286685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ms_Ice/pseuds/Ms_Ice
Summary: This is a fiction journal following the exploits and love life of a female heavy cavalry warrior in a matriarchal fantasy\medieval kingdom. There are references to violence and sex, but nothing explicit. This is something I wrote more as a method to get it out of my head, but someday I may turn it into a full proper story instead of just a diary.
Kudos: 2





	Edge of the Guillotine

**Author's Note:**

> This story reads best in the Google font Caveat, size 18 or larger. It really does change the feel of the whole thing so I would definitely recommend copy and pasting it into Google Documents or such.

126th Spring 30th

Tonight's entry will likely be the longest yet, I'll no doubt be writing this long into the night, for today the inevitable, the unlikely, and the impossible, all happened. Today my sisters and I rode into battle for the first time. It was as terrifying, as exhilarating, and simply as freeing, as I had always hoped. For once I was able to truly do my part for my people.

At first we watched as our brotherly soldiers fought bravely as always, living up to their name of The Anvil as the Magistrate's forces broke upon their steel. The Sky upon a nearby hill took out waves of the enemy soldiers and the main Axe took out any foes that strayed from their bulk. Today it wasn't enough though. Like how a stream erodes the shore, the enemy kept coming until our Anvil broke. There just was no end to the enemy forces and I realized with fear that our soldiers were being overrun. The sides blurred further and further until our Sky couldn’t tell friend from foe, and the Axe couldn’t do enough damage from the edges. Then our Lady rode her horse before us, and I realized with sudden dread that it was time.

She lifted her sword to the sky as she faced the battle and the beating of my own heart drowned out her command. Then she chopped her sword downwards at the enemy and all fifty of my sisters urged their horses forward suddenly, myself included. I’m not sure which was louder, Lavender’s hooves mixing in with the galloping of my sister’s mounts, the clanging of our armor, or the blood rushing through my body as we rapidly approached the battlefield. Still, I did as trained and focused on the soldiers ahead. I picked out the nearest foes and watched with a hawk's sight as two of them took out one of our own brothers. Suddenly I felt a rage I’ve never known before. They killed one of my brothers and for once, I could do something about it.

Even as I write this the memories of battle blur into a mess of steel and blood. All except when I saw the improbable. As I rode through the battle, striking death down from Lavender's back, I saw a single warrior completely surrounded. Over two dozen dead enemy lay strewn about around this one man anvil, yet more kept coming. I was amazed by this soldier's strength and speed and endurance all in a glance.

Something drew me to this warrior and I steered Lavender closer, joining in the fray nearby to assist them. Then, finally in the blink of an eye, there were no more enemies left standing. Exhilaration filled me, and yet suddenly weariness overtook me and I dropped my sword. It was the most careless thing I think I've ever done, but it was a blessing in disguise. The warrior strode up to me atop my steed and slowly, with a weariness I understood and shared, he stooped low and picked it up.

What happened next is clearer in my mind than everything else of the entire day. Nay, of my entire life. The warrior tilted his helmeted head up to me as he handed me my sword, treating it like it was glass. I saw this incredible soldier's face for the first time and I froze. This warrior who had fought off half a hundred men by themselves, who had shown more brute strength and skill than I'd ever seen before, was a woman.

I accepted my sword from her in shock, made speechless by her beauty and power. She said but one word, 'Henrietta', before walking away towards where one of the Anvil masters was issuing orders. My own Lady was striding through the battlefield on her steed, rallying our sisters towards her.

Looking back after the battle, I wish I could say I had been thinking of our fallen brothers and sisters, praying for their souls as proper. But instead I was praying upon my own soul that I would meet Henrietta again. Tomorrow I intend to start looking for her.

126th Spring 31th

The goddess was not with me today. I spent the day with my sisters searching through the armor and weapons gained from the Magistrate's defeated soldiers. Although I found a few items worth salvaging, no one I asked knew of the warrior Henrietta. I am not sure which saddens me more, my inability to find her, or that I lost thirteen of my fifty sisters and four hundred or more of my brothers yesterday. Many more still were injured and unable to help with the recovery. As much as the count affects me and my weariness drags at me, I still can't get the warrior woman out of my mind.

At least the general townsfolk served our Queen well today, helping fill in for the wounded soldiers. It will take many years to recover our forces completely, and yet the Magistrate's forces had to have suffered worse. They failed to break us and they lost more than twice what we lost. There are already rumors going around of regrouping our forces and striking the nearest enemy's village while they recover. I find myself torn over this idea. We are injured and our numbers far reduced, and yet we are still strong. The Goddess guides us and our faith remains. We want revenge. And I want to find Henrietta.

126th Spring 32nd

I found her! The Henrietta I was searching for came from a nearby village and is staying in the Anvil's quarters! As rumors of her deeds in battle spread, more and more people are learning her name. Just thinking about meeting her has my heart beating faster. This is new to me though. The only time I've ever felt close to this way has been about men, and I'm not even sure how to handle it now.

I've heard rumors that sister Ella enjoyed the company of women more than most, but I fear to seem foolish to ask her about such a thing. Still, I feel I need to see Henrietta first and learn more about her. Tomorrow I intend to visit the Anvil quarters under the guise of offering a sword to the warrior that helped me in battle. I traded some of the armor I gained as spoils of war for a sword I feel suits a warrior such as Henrietta. I only pray she accepts it. And maybe me with it.

126th Spring 34th

My plan failed yesterday. I learned the Anvil's Master himself gave Henrietta a beautiful ornate sword for her bravery. It suits her not, and yet my gift pales in comparison. In the other eye, I spoke at length to sister Ella yester day, to the point where my Lady punished my tardiness to my schoolings. Being the target for my younger sisters in training still has my sword hand hurting, hence why I was unable to write last night. At the same time my conversation with sister Ella was worth the pain.

Above all else, sister Ella gave me courage in this new path. I do not know if my feelings for Henrietta are real or just in my mind's eye, nor do I know if she has feelings for me in return. What I do know is that I have to meet her and find out. Sister Ella asked sister Irene and learned that Henrietta was seen training on her own out near one of the farms. As a favor sister Irene will let me know the next time Henrietta heads that way. Now I just wait. I feel that I may spend half the night praying to the goddess for strength.

126th Spring 35th

Today I finally met her and I may never recover from it. Sister Irene found me during my mid suns meal and let me know Henrietta had just left. In my casual skirts and blouse I excused myself and moved quickly to catch up with my goal, bracing myself along the way. Like my first meeting with her, I could never forget how I found her today. 

She was standing in the mud outside of the main walls, just around a corner out of sight, in full beat up set of armor. I admit I laughed out loud. Goddess bless her, she laughed a hearty laugh back when she saw me. She explained it was how she was taught to fight by her father. 'A warrior must be able to fight in all conditions,' she had said. When I remained skeptical of her methods she did what I should have seen coming. She challenged me. Like a fool, I accepted.

If it had been anyone else I would have died in embarrassment after my first rather sudden defeat. I had barely stepped into the mud when my shoe got stuck and came right off my foot. As I flailed like a fish out of water, one swing of her training sword made me topple over right down into the mud. After she helped me up she explained that her training boots have extra laces, and that fighting in mud strengthens the legs and sense of balance. I learned rather quickly how mud can be both slippery and sticky at the same time.

We spent the afternoon together, training in that muddy pit out of sight from others. My legs ache, my bruises are sore, and my clothes shall take half a day to get clean again. And yet I am content. Henrietta is an excellent teacher and being around her gives me a sense of… completion. Tomorrow my regular training with my sisters resumes and I fear it won't be the same any more.

126th Spring 41st

Between my schoolings, my training with my sisters and trying to replenish our ranks, plus my training with Henrietta, my time grows sparse. It has been days since my last entry. First and foremost my time with Henrietta has been incredible. She is… I don't believe I have a word for it. In all my schoolings I never heard a single word that truly describes her. She is everything.

She is a brilliant warrior, powerful and fast and skilled. She is a great teacher, explaining things in ways that simply make sense to me. She is… I still hesitate to say this... she is beautiful. Each afternoon we spend together I feel my feelings growing stronger. I do not know how to proceed, and yet when I'm with her it doesn't matter. We flow closer together like water to the sea. But alas I should make a record of things beyond Henrietta.

Our Lady has been scouring the surrounding villages for young women to join our training, while the ones in training already are being scrutinized to see if they're ready yet. So far only four of the thirteen lost have been replaced, but there are a few more possibles. I hear the Anvil has had more luck since they are less particular about their warriors.

On the last note, the rumors of an offensive strike on the Magistrate's camp seem to be growing in strength. Our warriors want revenge and I am not one to argue against it. The time may soon come and I have a feeling it will be my sisters and I leading the charge.

126th Spring 45nd

The rumors have become an official word from the Queen. We plan to leave for battle in ten days. The nearest Magistrate's village is three days by horse and there is already talk of the Guillotines and the Axes leading the way first. Our forces are still diminished but theirs moreso. The plan is simple. Strike quickly by horse and burn their camp to the ground before they know what happened. Then the Anvils will catch up to crush the remaining troops. I like this plan, and yet… and yet I have feelings new to me.

I have learned that Henrietta joined the first battle because the Queen had sent out requests to all villages for reinforcements before the battle, resulting in Henrietta's village sending her. I understand now why Henrietta was fighting alone in that battle when I found her. Those that had arrived with her had died in battle and she is not officially part of our warriors. Outsiders in our close knit units are frowned upon, to the point where the only reason she wasn't dismissed afterwards was due to her bravery. The Anvil's Master offered her a spot in their ranks, something that gave me great joy to hear, and yet she has yet to accept it. I asked her why she has not accepted the offer, but her answer was a shrug and to state that she just wasn't sure yet.

In one eye I want her by my side in battle, I trust no one more than her with my life. In the other eye a small part of me worries that she could fall in battle. Nay, not just worries, but is terrified of losing her. I've never felt this strongly about my own sisters or even any lover I've had before. She is a warrior and I haven't known her a half season, yet already I feel so strongly about her. Alas I am also aware it is her decision whether or not to fight. I just hope to be by her side regardless.

126th Spring 53th

Tomorrow night I and my sisters, along with the Axes, will leave ahead of the Anvil. We'll be moving in a bowed route towards Fora Mino and the enemy camp. Our duty will be to reach the camp, rest the horses for a day, then strike the camp with the sunrise. If all goes as planned, the Anvil will reach the camp later on the same day and strike while they're recovering.

For once I have mixed feelings about going into battle. Henrietta accepted the offer to join the Anvil. I remain proud of her and I hope to rejoin the Anvil so that I may fight beside her again. And yet, there is a new feeling in my center. There is an intense fear deep down that I will lose her during the fighting. It terrifies me more than it should.

I took a moment to look back at entries from when I was younger, when I was seeing one of the Anvil's warriors years ago. Even right before Durnum died in battle I did not feel as I do now. But my path is now set by duty the same as hers, I just pray that Henrietta's path joins mine for as long as possible.

126th Summer 5th

It has been a long time since I have written in this journal and much has happened since my last entry here. Thinking back it surprises even me how long it's been.

The March to Fora Mino was gruelling, and yet it went as planned. My sisters and I split from the Axes during the night, allowing us to strike the Magistrate's camp from two sides at once. It went exactly as intended. With horses ready we killed their sentry runners before the camp could be notified. When we arrived there was chaos and we struck down many of their troops in rapid succession.

The Axes took the highest credit though, as they happened across the enemy commander's tent. He was removed before he could rally his troops and by time someone had filled the void, we were already leaving. To their credit a small force tried to follow us. At least until they came into sight of the Anvil as we met up with them. Some of the small force actually surrendered when they realized what was coming their way. As I had hoped I met up with Henrietta before the next stage commenced. Lavender was too tired to fight again so soon, so in an act that surprised myself even, I joined Henrietta on foot.

She fought with the same power and speed I remembered from our first battle, only now she seemed to fight with more grace. At some point during the battle I recognized some of her style as what I had once been taught. It was then that I realized she had been studying me even as she had been teaching me. Something about that drew us closer together during the fight.

That night, as our warriors celebrated our victory with our brothers and sisters, Henrietta sought me out. I still can't believe I'm about to write this, but as we drank from the Magistrate's supplies, she kissed me. The next thing I knew we were kissing and touching each other like young adults! I couldn't believe it and yet I still remember the feel of her lips on mine, the taste of the mead on her breath, and her clothed body against mine. The only reason we stopped was because my Lady interrupted.

My Lady brought unwelcome news that night. Our spies in other villages had learned that the Magistrate had already sent new forces to bolster the camp we were occupying. We had to make a choice. Stand and fight or flee. The camp was still damaged in sections from our raid that very morning, it wasn't easily defendable. My Lady wanted both my and Henrietta's opinions in the meeting with the Anvil's Master and the Axe's Handle. She had seen us fight in both battles and was apparently impressed.

The meeting was brief, simply because we had all decided already. We would stay and fight. The only question was how. In the end we chose a good land position for the Anvil to dig in. My sisters and the Axe's would do what we do best, strike at the flanks and rear as the enemy struck the Anvil. I very much wished we had our Skies with us that day.

When the battle came both forces were tired from traveling, yet ours had a day to recover some and prep. It wasn't enough but we would make due. The battle was harsh on us, but after Lavender collapsed from a crossbow bolt I found myself fighting directly beside Henrietta. I can not explain it, but every weak spot she had I protected. Every weak spot I had she protected. Our foes died before our blades by the dozens. And when the enemy started to avoid us and our blood stained selves? We came to them. 

The fighting went on as fatigue took both sides. Then my Lady, the Lady of the Guillotines that taught and raised and led us, fell in battle. My sisters and I rallied, with Henrietta at my side, and we broke the Magistrate's forces once and for all. My love and I stood before the enemy's commander and his personal warriors. We had won. Those that didn't surrender were slain where they stood.

Now I have returned to my home, hailed a heroine along side my Henrietta. Our foe is vanquished and hopefully we will return to peace once again.

126th Summer 8th

As I write this Henrietta lies in my bed asleep. Again the Goddess has surprised me. Henrietta came to me this evening, wishing to train together again. It has only been two days since our return and we are far from recovered, and yet I said yes. As we trained I started to realize there was more to it. Her attacks were more designed to cause our bodies to clash instead of our blades. Then, when she successfully knocked me down, she came down on top of me. With the wind knocked out of my chest she kissed me.

After kissing deeply for a bit on the ground, still in our muddy armor, she let me up. Together we went back to my room and… and we made love together on my very own bed. I have never been with a woman before and I must say it was... interesting. Henrietta was forceful and passionate, and yet it took some time for us to find each other's pleasure. When we finally guided each other correctly it turned out to be almost the best I've ever had. And I feel like next time will only be better. Who knew a tongue could be used that way?

On another note, the Queen has requested my presence in two days. I suspect she wants my help finding a new Lady of the Guillotines. I will miss my Lady greatly, but as with myself and all my sisters, we know our duty comes before our lives. For the Queen and Goddess we live and die. That is what it means to be a warrior of the Guillotines.

126th Summer 10th

I am still in shock. Today I stood before the Queen and was given the title of Lady of the Guillotines. Tales of my battle next to my Henrietta have spread like weeds, growing taller with each passing day. Now the rumors say we fought off a thousand foes side by side, showing how true comradery can aid in battle. And the Queen wants me to teach it to my sisters! I don’t even know where to begin! Tomorrow my… the previous Lady’s... aids are supposed to start showing me my new duties. Henrietta couldn’t even meet with me today, but perhaps… perhaps I might have some ideas for how to proceed. 

Needs dictate that if the Queen wants to hold up my comradery with my love, then of course she couldn’t argue Henrietta and I spending more time together. Perhaps I can use this to my advantage. Tomorrow I shall test my new boundaries and see what happens. I can but pray to the Goddess that I have the skills needed to perform my new duties.

126th Summer 17th

My students are going to be the death of me. They do everything I tell them to like it was coming from the Goddess's own lips. My 'legend' keeps growing, made worse by when I sparred with one of my previous sisters. My training with Henrietta apparently threw Irene off entirely and I dropped her to the ground like a rotten branch. Twice. She may never forgive me, but she follows me willingly.

As has always been our way, the horse training is still done by Joseph of the stables. The old man is still moving. I remember how old he seemed when I went through his training. To think he's still going is a testament to his faith in the Goddess. His son and daughter seem to be following in his footsteps too. It's nice to hear his skills won't die yet.

Henrietta and I have been spending whatever time together that we can. Mostly it's once the sun has set and the days trainings are done. Instead of our previous training we’ve taken up eating a small meal together and simply talking about how our days went. Some nights we make love, other nights we simply sleep in each other’s arms. My time with her has proven to me that the Goddess truly watches over me, for she has gifted me with such rapture words do not do it justice. I love her.

126th Summer 35th

The nerve! Today one of the princes of an outer village tried to court my Henrietta! She turned him down of course, but he went so far as to swear by the goddess he'd try again until she said yes! The fool is blinded by lust and refuses to see reason. Even those that ask for my time have always had the sense to accept my answer. For the time being Henrietta is keeping Lord Geoff away but his stubbornness worries me.

Beyond Lord Geoff's advances everything is fine. Stressful, but fine. I never considered how much trouble my sisters and I caused for the previous Lady, right up until I took her place. I have also learned why the previous Lady pushed us so hard at times. It wasn't just to make us better warriors as we were always told. It was also because if we were all too tired and sore to move we wouldn't cause trouble. I have taken this lesson to heart.

Our ranks are replenished and our training goes well. Before the end of summer I expect to have my daughters ready for battle. Now if I could only send them to deal with Lord Geoff.

126th Summer 37th

Of all the foolish things Lord Geoff could do… I found out that yesterday he tried to convince our Queen to push Henrietta into marrying him for political reasons. To be polite our Queen listened, then after Lord Geoff left she called both Henrietta and I before her. It amazes me that the Queen even knows of our relationship.

She asked the situation between us and we openly admitted our love. She understood and accepted it, but reminded us that it was still our duty each to birth a child. 'Your strengths as warriors must not be lost to the future,' she said. I understand my duty to the kingdom and the Goddess, but how can I share my love with a man like Lord Geoff? He brings no strength to a child.

Still, as much as it pains my heart, the final choice is Henrietta's. I have to trust that our love will hold and the Goddess will guide us as always.

126th Summer 39th

I have resolved the situation with Lord Geoff, but in a way that was not my intention. I currently write this entry from my room as two guards stand outside my door. I murdered Lord Geoff with my own hands. I have killed many, many, men but never in a rage such as what I felt today. It still makes my blood explode in anger just thinking about it. He drugged her.

Henrietta did not show up for our usual evening together. As it grew later and later I grew more and more worried. Finally I went to her room in the Axe's barracks. She wasn't there. Trying not to panic I asked around. Some of them had seen her heading towards the keep. Then a woman I will forever owe thanks said she had seen Henrietta being half carried out by Lord Geoff.

Things turned to a blur as I lost myself in rage and concern. I remember running through the halls, finding Lord Geoff's room, having to break the door down… then finding the woman I love unconscious and naked on Lord Geoff's bed. As I tried to wake her he walked into the room with sword drawn, I guess from having seen his door broken down. Even without my sword my rage took over.

The next thing I knew I was standing over his kneeling body with his sword in my hands, the blade run through his chest. I dropped the handle in shock and his body toppled to the floor. All I could do was pick up Henrietta and carry her to the healer. Thinking back I'm surprised I managed to carry her. She is not a small sapling.

The healers insisted that she would be fine, that she was given a brew of sleep and she'd awake when it wore off. When they asked what had happened I saw no way to lie and I spoke the full truth as I have written it here. Guards brought me to my room and I have remained here since. The sun is rising and yet I haven't slept. I fear not for my own life, but only for hers. I hear footsteps approaching and I believe this may be my last entry.

Forever the Goddess's blade, Johanna Archal.

126th Summer 40th

Somehow, I write this entry in a new day. To my own surprise, I am not dead. Thankfully neither is Henrietta. The brew of sleep wore off and she awoke before the sun rose. The Queen herself questioned Henrietta on what happened, then promptly pardoned me. I have to admit, I cried tears of joy when I was allowed to see my love again.

I spent the day at Henrietta's side, excused from all duties as the Queen deliberated on how to handle the situation. It was a beautiful day. A day I was sure I would never experience. No classes to teach or daughters coming to me with their troubles. Even the boiling heat wasn't enough to dull our spirits.

It wasn't until after midsun that our Queen joined Henrietta and I personally as we watched the Axes train in the fields. The Queen asked me to deliver Geoff's body to his keep, and dump it before his throne with a warning. 'To all men that would seek to subdue the Goddess within us, this is our answer. Death will come to all who cross our strength.' She even gave me a royal seal with the message written in Geoff's blood.

At Henrietta's request the Queen allowed her to join my daughters in escorting me on my task. I welcome her presence, even if I am a little concerned about my love on horseback. She's never been very good with horses. We set out tomorrow with the Goddess's blessing.

127th Autumn 2nd

It has been a great many days since my last entry. My mission to Geoff's keep went well at first, with his body and the message delivered with ease. Then came the ambush. Upon our way back home we were attacked by a small party from the south. My arm was injured during the skirmish but we managed to kill most of our foes.

It turns out that Geoff had been conversing with the Kingdom of Trois in the south. He was playing both sides to see who would give him more power. Since my injured return I have been doing nothing but going over reports in meetings with the Queen, the Master of the Anvil, the new Axes Handle, as well as the Skies Sun. We've learned more about the Kingdom of Trois than I ever thought we'd know. I give great credit to the Queen's spies. 

Officially we are not at war with the Kingdom of Trois yet, but they have been moving their armies to our border threateningly. I also learned that two of my daughters come from the nearest village across the border. Tomorrow I have to determine whose side they fight on if we do go to war.

Henrietta has been the stone underneath me this whole time. She has helped me care for my arm and bring it back to full strength, provided a second opinion when needed, and distracted me when I needed it more. With her help I've been able to resume all my duties. All the while she hasn't slowed in her own regular training with the Anvil's. She is more than I could ever ask the Goddess for.

127th Autumn 17th

The Kingdom of Trois moves. Their King Tynus claims that our beliefs threaten their own, and that we seek to subvert them from their God. They started by capturing all of our people passing through their lands. Our Queen had no choice but to do the same to their people on ours. We can only hope for a trade to keep them safe, or their blood will be the end of the Kingdom of Trois.

127th Autumn 20th

King Tynus executed our people. There is no turning back now. He will pay for their blood with his kingdom and his life. The Queen's forces prepare as we speak, I among them to lead my Guillotine's. In two days we march straight for their capital.

All our meetings about the Kingdom of Trois led to one thought. The land and the placement of their villages gives benefit to a straight march and assault from our lands. Their roads will handle our horses and carts. The terrain is easy enough for our troops to march. The only obstacle will be their own army. 

Their numbers are more than our own, but the main bulk of their force is mere peasants with no training or gear. We are all trained warriors, with the Goddess on our side. We shall prevail. This time I shall be bringing my dairy and kit with me, for I know I may not return. But if I fall, my Henrietta will be by my side and I will die fighting for what I believe.

127th Autumn 23rd

The first day of our march went well. My daughters have been efficient and given me much pride this day. As is often our way we are last in the shambling formation that is our thousands of brothers and sisters in battle. Unlike in battle, our duty is to be the armored anvil to protect our rear should the enemy try a sneak attack.

According to the Queen's scouts and spies our foe is amassing their forces to meet us head on. They clearly believe us to be weak. Typical foreign men. Their underestimation raises our morale even further though. Our warriors can't wait to show them how superior our Goddess and Queen are.

I can't help but think of Henrietta in the same thoughts as my Queen and the Goddess. In fact, I believe it not. My love has found me amidst the thousands of troops nearby. I shall continue this later.

127th Autumn 28th

We trod onwards. During the day we walk, letting our horses save their strength. During the night Henrietta and I either make love or just rest together. Without speaking it we've spent each night together like it was our last, knowing that it very well may be. I will not speak my fears aloud, but I know they mirror her own. I love her and she loves me, that is all that matters.

We draw nearer and nearer to the enemy with each passing day, their march slower and less organized than our own. Within a few days both sides shall reach the likely battlefield. I have studied the maps with my counterparts at length, and I have come to one conclusion. The enemy commander's must be complete fools.

They seem to have chosen a wide open farmland for the battlefield. Our Skies will have open view. Our Axe's and my Guillotine's will have free reign of movement. And finally our Anvil will be able to dig in with ease. Our foes seem to think their numbers will let them roll right over us. I can't help but grin with wicked glee when I think of their faces when we do not break as they expect.

127th Autumn 30th

I write this now as I look out over the battlefield at my enemy. I have to admit their numbers are daunting. So many people spread out across the horizon, like a plague of insects waiting to devour all. And yet I know their numbers matter not. We have the skill, the determination, and our Goddess on our side.

Tomorrow our forces will collide and no matter the result, our Goddess will prevail. We will show them our faith and for every one of us that falls, twenty of them shall fall first. For the Goddess. For our Queen. For my Henrietta.

127th Autumn 33rd

No words can describe the pain I feel, yet I feel I must write something lest my thoughts consume me in blackness. My faith waivers. Henrietta is… she is dead. She fell in battle and I was not there for her. I have cried all night for the past two nights, until my tears would fall no more. Even now tears threaten to fall and stain this page, yet none come.

She did all our people proud and will be remembered for more years than I shall see. Hundreds of foes fell before her blade, the very one I gave her. I was proud not for my own accomplishments, but instead that my gift helped her reach such heroic heights. 

In comparison I killed less than a hundred soldiers. It matters not to me that I and my sisters killed the enemy's commander's and their personal guards. Henrietta still held the Anvil strong against the tide, where others would have fallen. Without her, we would have lost the battle.

With our victory the king of Trois is now in range. Even with our fallen brothers and sisters rising upon the smoke of pyre towards the Goddess, we still have the strength to move onwards. More than that, many of the enemies we defeated chose our side over their King. Just as I wrote previously, our faith broke them. They have sworn not just to our Queen, but to our Goddess. And not just in word, but in blood as well. All shall carry a scar to show their new belief in our ways.

As I write this entry I feel my faith and resolve returning full. But it is more than that. I feel a new strength, one born of more than faith. Thinking about all the soldiers that joined us upon seeing my love fight, it gives me a strange rage. Yes, she is dead and I will take out my anger upon our foe, but I will do more than that. I must do more than that to give her the respect she deserves. For her love and for my Goddess that brought her to me, I will go beyond simple vengeance.

In two days we will reach King Tynus's castle. With the Goddess as my witness and my love waiting beyond, I swear by my life that I will not just kill King Tynus, but I will show all the power of our Goddess and our people. All will bow our might and join us, or they will die. I will be more than just the Lady of the Guillotine's, I will be the very edge of the guillotine itself that all fear.

For Henrietta, I will become all that she was to me and more. Thank you my love for giving me such strength forever.


End file.
